Facebook - Days of The Primordial Ooze

Whoa - I was able to impress my kids. As any parent knows, or shall I say, a parent who is more interested in being a good parent than a good friend to their children, this is rare air. And for about 5-10 seconds, the duration of their being impressed, I took a deep breath and held it in as long as I could. ahhhhhhh. Exhale.

Here's what impressed them. I told them, girls - your dad was on Facebook over a decade before the founder was born. Incredulous, no way Daddy. Yes... Way! I was able to pull some information from the Wikipedia entry on Mark Zuckerberg, and as we all know - Wikipedia is just like the internet. It is all true (haha). Then I highlighted this part of his bio:

The idea for Facebook came from his days at Phillips Exeter Academy which, like most colleges and prep schools, had a long-standing tradition of publishing an annual student directory with headshot photos of all students, faculty and staff known as the "Facebook".

The truth is, when this old dinosaur went to school at PEA, the Exeter address book was a somewhat new idea. Printing costs had come down, and the concept of an in school address book became a reasonable idea. Thanks to my buddy Whit from Dunbar, I saw this primordial homepage of Facebook from 1974-75 (pic). Back then, we called this - a cover, not a homepage, but that is just semantics. And much to my surprise, whoa - my brother was on the homepage of facebook! And in case you were wondering, my blessed little offspring of nematodes - back then computers looked like this. The year I was born, Jack Kilby and Robert Noyce invented a really fancy thing called an integrated circuit. Noyce founded Intel - which was a new company in 1968. Here's a one minute video history lesson of modern computers- I am certain will leave you laughing, especially that super nifty GPS Garmin wanna be thing in the car.



And once again, thanks to my buddy Whit - I was able to prove my claim, that I was on Facebook well over a decade before the founder Mark Zuckerberg was born. I mean, even to kids today - a picture is worth over a thousand words. Sorry about the focus, but Whit just snapped a quick photo with his cell and uploaded to Facebook using an application in his phone. So my dear, sweet, precious children - I am getting old, and still have every intention of living long enough to be a burden to you... but I ain't THAT olde... yet.

Hurricane Season History

Even with all the modern updates, we still get slammed by hurricanes from time to time. But it was not that long ago, when there was no warning system at all. The beach could be filled with tourists or locals, the weather gets a little overcast and folks would go about their business as if nothing was out of the ordinary. And then - WHAM. Out of nowhere, a category 4 or category 5 hurricane would blow in and lead to not only massive destruction of property, but also many many thousands casualties.

And, you can thank a guy named Grady Norton, a weather guy pioneer from Miami who worked to create many of the safety features we take for granted today.

Check out this cool episode of a show called Man Behind the Badge for a half hour TV dramatization of Grady Norton and the way they used to try and predict Hurricanes. Pretty interesting, we have come a long way over the last 60 years.



In this show, Grady Norton is played by an actor named Milburn Stone.


In the real world, Grady Norton looked like much more of a mild mannered science nerd.



And here we are in late August 2009. Hurricane Bill has just been upgraded to a category 4. Hmmm, something tells me that old Marvelettes song might come into play. You remember the song - Don't mess with Bill. Here's the latest Bill updates from the National Hurricane Center at NOAA.

Back to Olde School Special

As a child born in the 1950s, I have been having this weird deja-vu experience, wondering to myself if I am in some kind of time warp or something. Growing up as a kid in the 1960s made the whole "revolution thing" kinda weird. I was very young, and actually was innocent too - which is nothing remarkable for children below the age of ten. So people doing drugs, experimenting with free love, and all the peace, love beautiful experience was at best, admirable yet quirky and at worst, gross and creepy. (see Born to Win Trailer for further clarification). And as I listen to people talk on TV about current politics - sorry - but it all has a familiar ring to it. Nice in theory, but people are still those pesky human creatures in spite of the best altruistic intentions. (Despotism or Democracy? provides an interesting angle on this).

To further clarify the point I am trying to make - check out a few movies from back in the 1970s that in retrospect seem downright idiotic. First up - The Harrad Experiment, featuring Tippi Hedron and Don Johnson, the film was all about free love and the desire to express our sexuality without the hassles of marriage - which really just made "us possessive and jealous in our expressions of love". Yeah - just fine thinking - unless you are a child of divorce. From that perspective, it just seems like you have self-absorbed parents who should have been more concerned about the kids "needs" than their own. It gets weird. Don Johnson is a student at Harrad College, where the kids are schooled in free love. Don wants to have sexual relations with a teacher, Tippi Hedron - who undresses herself to try and scare him away. Like I said - weird. Want weirder? In the real world - years later, Don Johnson would marry Melanie Griffith - who was Tippi Hedron's daughter. And don't fret about difficulty at holiday gatherings. They got divorced.

Now before you start thinking I am some kind of Joe Friday, you know, a square who works for "the man" type - rest assured I went through the teenage experience with unbridled passion for hippies, peace, love and all kinds of anti-capitalist ideology. At Duke, I took classes in Socialism and Communism, thinking it was a potential answer to the problems of the world. Jimi Hendrix was my favorite musician, I had an oversized libido (see Guido's Libido) like everyone else, and I might very well have tried a few pharmaceuticals that were not prescribed by my attending physician.

You see, from my befuddled perspective - both sides have a point, but it does no good when nobody is listening. For example - sexuality is a wonderful blessing and gift, and I love children - but is it right that I am subjected to old people in bathtubs musing about hooking up while trying to watch tv with my young daughter. Sorry - make it go away - please. And how could you do that do an Elvis movie about Vegas? Stop it.

And for those who have no recourse but to call people who disagree with them racists - go check out a few movie blasts from the past. The Klansman, is a really creepy, annoying, contrived, preachy film reduced to silliness. And then the real world makes it even weirder. The film features a scene where Linda Evans is raped by O.J. Simpson, who later tries to escape while holding a knife to Richard Burton's throat. The getaway car? - oh my, would you believe it is a Ford Bronco. I believe Martin Luther King's dream (see some MLK video snippets from the I Have a dream speech) - and the Bob Marley song, War - where he wished for a day when the color of a man's skin was of no more significance than the color of his eyes. And I like this dream, and I share in Dr. King's hope that is becomes reality. But calling people racist because they disagree with another man's views who has a different skin color - belittles the indelible images in my brain, of defenseless Black people getting slammed by blasting water from firehouses in a peaceful protest. It cheapens the courage of Rosa Parks, it makes light of a hard and long battle fought by your grandparents and their grandparents before them.

And war is wrong and terrible. (Grand Illusion, Forbidden Games, search for War) No two ways around it. Yet sometimes - a good man must fight to defend the rights of his family and children. Don't buy that? Watch Escape From Sobibor and convince yourself that good men should do nothing. It is not so easy as black and white.

In conclusion - I wish we would spend more time listening to another person's views, rather than shouting louder with this week's talking points. In most cases - both sides have valid things to say, that are heartfelt and true. And as Flannery O'Connor once said - The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it.

And if this is way too serious - let me say, fine with me. I would rather laugh watching some early George Carlin doing the Hippy Dippy Weatherman.

Maximilian Kolbe - August 14th

Each year on August 14 - there's a celebration and memorial of a wonderful man you probably never even heard of. His name was Maximilian Kolbe and he was a Catholic priest in Poland during World War II. During the war, Catholic priests were marked for death by the nazis, and Max was no exception to this rule. But Max was exceptionally wicked as far as any nazi was concerned. His crimes also included trying to harbor Jews and to try and get them out safely. But that is not why he is honored today.

He lived a very good life as a priest - a Franciscan, ordained in Rome, and did much more in his life - but he is honored not so much for his life, but for his heroic death. The nazis sent him to Auschwitz, and someone tried to escape. The punishment for this included not only death for the prisoner trying to escape, but the nazis decided that someone else must be killed as well - just to make the point that escaping was not a good idea. When a father of several children was selected to be killed and tortured for the escape - Fr. Max Kolbe asked to be killed and tortured in his place, telling the guards - he had no family - so please take me instead. And he was brutally tortured, and finally died from the torture. And Fr. Kolbe knew what was coming, yet he still chose to volunteer his life for the young father of several children.

The Catholic church at first was a bit perplexed as to whether or not to honor Max Kolbe as a martyr - because he volunteered to die. But, in the end he was designated as a martyr, specifically, a martyr of charity. Years later, when the church was planning to beatify Kolbe as a saint - the father whose life was spared many years before - spent most of his life's savings to attend the ceremony.

To honor Max Kolbe today - we thought we'd suggest a powerful movie in the movie library you might have missed. Escape from Sobibor, starring Alan Arkin, Rutger Hauer, and Joana Pacula - tells the story of the most successful escape from a concentration camp in Poland during World War II. Yep - another great story you probably never heard about. If time allows - check it out, it is a great film, and an even better story.

Beer Summit - The Conference at Malta

Time for a beer summit of our own at LikeTelevision - yep, it looks like the time is right - it just turned beer thirty. And today we have an incredible cast of characters joining us today. PLUS this lovely portrait taken by an olde artist at a beer session with a dog - be careful not to tip the Cold Nukie lil fella!



Our dear chum - W.C. Fields starts off the tap with - A Fatal Glass of Beer. Now, no worries as Mr. Fields has been dead for some time now. Not sure - I think Mae West might have devoured him a few decades back after she objected to being called a chickadee.

And sorry folks - ain't no way we are going with a Budweiser. Not gonna happen - sheesh, it is made outta rice and this is a beer summit, not a Saki Session with Sushi. And we are not really that interested in Blue Moon or a Red Stripe either, though we have always been big fans of Jamaica, especially the Sunsplash Music Festival in late summer in honor of Bob Marley. For our taste - we prefer a cool Newcastle, a Bass Ale and if we want something light - few brewskis top the PBR, or Pabst Blue Ribbon to the uninitiated.

But - lest we forget, we are olde school here - so let's get some top picks from back in the day. Well - Colt 45 (Skydiving) or Colt 45 (Surfing) has got to be way up near the top. Besides having some awesome commercials, it tasted pretty good and believe it or not, we were in a band that had a slight twist on the name. The band was called Cult 45 - and was known for the ridiculous album cover (Will design web pages for beer). The top radio cuts off the vinyl were Popemobile and Turn Me on Dead Man. Now before you get your opus dei cilice all tangled up in your panties, another name in NASCAR for new tires is Virgin Rubber and we are from the south, where people actually like shrimp with grits.... so Chill Ace. You will have to listen to Popemobile to understand what the heck I am talking about.

And to wrap it up - one of our favorite beer commercials from back in the sweet days of gentle women happy to go get us guys a beer while we relaxed in the hammock --- ahhh. Was it so long ago. I do miss the days when women were actually less ambitious and obnoxious as men - but that was then and this is now. Remember back with this Carling Black Label beer classic.

Old School Horror Movies

Back when I was a kid, we'd watch scary movies at the local theater or on Shock Theater, which came on every Saturday at 2 PM. This was a great way to spend some time. Sure, most of the movies were pretty schlock-y, and not really that scary - but that was part of the fun. Back then, two of the greats in the horror movie genre were Vincent Price and Roger Corman. And sometimes, the two collaborated and this combination was almost always a treat for the avid fan. We decided to highlight one of the best for the upcoming weekend - but first, we thought we should offer a few older classics you might have missed.

If you have never seem The Last Man on Earth or Theater of Blood, you are missing two of Vincent Price's best films. Please, take the time and see the horror master at the peak of his long and storied career. Another film also seems timely - given all the yammering about health care reform. Check out Shock, for a view of old school health care horror stories. HA!

As for Roger Corman, you really have to check out Little Shop of Horrors and Bucket of Blood, both of which offer fun stories and also a great snapshot of the era when they were filmed. Bucket of Blood is especially fun, with the beatnik poet lounge where people are all pretentious about their art. LikeTelevision offers many more Roger Corman films too. Personally, I am a big fan of all his work. He was the master of making a film with almost money to do so.

And now for the weekend featured film - Tales of Terror. A cool old school horror classic featuring a collaboration of Roger Corman working with Vincent Price, serving up three short stories from the master of scary prose, Edgar Allen Poe. No, you are going to loads of severed limbs or have your senses assaulted by bloody body parts. This old school scary, which asks you to have a little imagination. Think you can handle it? I hope so. Enjoy the show.

Man on the Moon Videos

I remember July 20, 1969 quite well. I was nine years old at the time, and was woken up in the middle of the night by my dad to watch something historic. I had no idea what historic meant, but I was old enough to understand that some men landing on the moon was pretty amazing. The TV picture was really grainy, even for the TVs of the day which were quite prehistoric compared to today's models. Heck, we often used tin foil on the rabbit ears (the antennae) to try and get better reception. We watched it on a big RCA color tv and it was the only tv in the house that worked well. HA - times sure have changed huh? Check out the newsreel video of the moon landing and imagine for a minute what that day was like for kids all over the world.



To mark this historic day - we thought you might enjoy a few classic movies and tv shows related to the moon, space travel, and aliens. First up - check out the classic serial, Radar Men From the Moon starring Clayton Moore, best known for his role as the Lone Ranger. In this serial, he plays a thug for the evil radar men from the moon. It is really funny, but in the day, it was actually supposed to be scary. Another classic on space travel is The First Spaceship to Venus. Again, this is funny, though it was not supposed to be. Speaking of Venus, check out this music video from the great Unknown Hinson called Venus Bound. Want more - no problem. Check out Planet Outlaws, starring Buster Crabb and Killer from Space is awesome! It stars Peter Graves and a bunch of aliens with ping pong ball eyes. If you are looking for something a little more modern, we would suggest Brother from Another Planet and a Peter Jackson alien classic called Bad Taste.

And from the classic tv channel - please check out the Burns and Allen episode titled Space Patrol Girls. FUNNY STUFF! There's also a few Flash Gordon tv shows to review, our top pick is Akim the Terrible. If you enjoy all things weird as much as we do - check out this old cheerios V-8 tv commercial offering a free spaceship game with your box of cherios. And oh yeah, have a V-8 with that too. and speaking of tv commercials - yep, there was an astronaut doll for young boys named Major Matt Mason. And let's not forget Santa Claus Conquers the Martians.

There is so much space related video at LikeTelevision, honestly there's not enough time to write about all of it - just search for space and you will busy for hours. Or search for moon. And when that gets old, try a search for aliens for even more movies and tv shows from the great beyond.